Dear Imperfect Being,
when was the last time you felt disappointment? that kind of choking feeling that tells you that smth is just not right, or rather, up to par with your standards. were you clueless then? did you really know how or what to feel? did you just stare blankly into space? did you pick up a phone to dial someone’s number? or did you cry?
maybe it is in times like these that you can be reminded of how imperfect you are. sometimes you wished you could have done things right, or that you wldn’t feel certain way at certain times. or that you wished you dont have to face the battle with your insecurities every now and then. its tough. You know you’ve made many mistakes already, but nevermind, it is the time to learn anyway. but thank God for them because that’s what makes God so perfect. it’s like, a standard which no one can ever reach. that’s what makes God, well, God.
this is a heartfelt letter to you. perhaps your search for your identity kicks into high gear now, that’s why you’re taking on so many things. i am sorry that some may judge you unfairly because of that. you grew up having a fixed impression of yourself and living it up to the fullest, and then at this moment you realised that its either you’ve changed or it wasn’t really the real you all this while. you’re probably just as confused about your emotions as i am sometimes. you’re learning to deal with new emotions that come your way. it’s an internal struggle which i know well enough. though i don’t have a solution for you right now, all i can say is that maybe you should learn to love and stop being so hard on yourself.
i guess it’s hard to find someone who will truly appreciate and love an imperfect being. apart from God, family and friends who have always been faithful and loving, i believe that one day someone would come to truly appreciate you for who you are, including your flaws and imperfections which i know full well.
till next time.
love,
the imperfect me.
